Informal Presentation to Peers

I have reached another important milestone on this first year of my doctoral journey: the 'informal' presentation of my proposal to peers.

This was, frankly, terrifying.

I am now a confident public speaker, and regularly get invited to present at education conferences.  The thing is, when I do that, I am usually the person in the room who knows most about my 'thing', whatever it happens to be. Often, it is related to the specific way we have handled a particular idea or initiative within the department and I am merely disseminating something that is perceived as good practice.  I am the expert; I have done the 'thing', and I am one of the people most qualified to talk about it.  I am, therefore, usually confident that I can respond to any question that might be generated.

For this presentation though, whilst I still know an awful lot about my substantive topic (the teaching of reading in secondary English education) on points of methodology I am just about the least knowledgeable person in the room. And given that I am intending to undertake a form of participatory action research, not PAR in its truest sense, there was plenty that was shaky, or at least unsubstantiated, about the methodology.

Also, because of the part-time nature of my studies, I have only met the other members of my cohort ever so briefly; only had a real, actual, conversation with one of them.  So they weren't really a known audience.

But I did it, and have now had something of an opportunity to reflect on it.

I know that I need to make the 'narrative' aspect of the presentation, the rationale, more joined up. I realise that some of what I was saying was irrelevant, and leading me (and my audience) down unnecessary paths. I need to define some of my terms. 'Authentic' is one. My methodology needs to be significantly more robust - but I think I am beginning to see where and how. There are some gaps that are easy to fill - aspects of early ethical considerations in relation to teacher-time need to be more clearly explained, for example.

How did I feel at the end of it? Relieved, elated and grateful.

Relieved that I'd made it through.
Elated by the supportive, thoughtful responses offered by my academic peers.
Grateful for their suggestions and feedback.

I also, finally, understood that I need not be defensive (at this stage!) - it really was an opportunity to 'test the water'. The water is quite cool, but now I have dipped a toe in I think I can get a little bit braver.

Vaulting Hurdles and Admiring Ivory Towers

Blame the English teacher in me who can't resist a metaphor. Last month it was milestones, this time it is hurdles. I'm safely over one (submitting that draft literature review) and now in the run up to the second.

One of the perils of full time work combined with part-time study is the disconnectedness from all campus activity. I have a 'cohort' of some faces that I recognise, but might struggle to put a name to, or could only do so by a process of elimination.  The rest of the cohort know and support each other and are familiar with aspects of each other's research.  They are also at the stage now of presenting their proposals before seeking ethical approval. I have a date provisionally booked in for an informal presentation of mine in early May (that next hurdle) along with the other part-time student.  Notice the singular.

But yesterday was a rare opportunity to spend the day at the university, watching the presentations and meeting up with people that I haven't seen since the first day of the academic year back in September. The style of those presentations was as varied as the projects and the presenters themselves. Ideas spanned disciplines, paradigms and continents. All were nervous before they began, and some were treated more sensitively than others in the question and answer sessions which followed. Gulp. So I know now what I am aiming it.

But the biggest privilege of yesterday's experience was the reminder of the pace of life within the walls of the university.

There was time for a two hour lunch break. I read, reflected on the morning's presentations, made some notes, visited the library (oh, what a place to be). It was all so civilised and so far removed from inside the walls of my school where this week has been the monthly department meeting, the Year 11 'Walking Talking Mock' and all the resulting marking; BBC School Report with 270 Year 8 students and all the stress of the deadline; Year 12 and Year 13 tracking - and then a full teaching load around all of that.

It really is two worlds colliding and I have to keep reminding myself of their ultimate interconnectedness and the fact that they do and will impinge on each other in dramatic ways.  Difficult to remember when I finally remembered to wolf down lunch as the bell went this afternoon. But the feedback on my literature review put a little fillip into Monday's step - so thorough and developmental as it was - and I have to remember to offer my own students the same.  A timely reminder, indeed.

Limbering up now for that next leap.